Electric Sheep

Aside from giving me the ability to torrent, the thing I love about Transmission is all of statistical data it outputs. I could spend the rest of my days staring at those numbers flow by. It's more than just watching the download and upload speeds, that comes standard with most Net apps. It's the unique technology of torrenting that fascinates me so. I'm drawn to the spontaneity of the torrent cloud. How many leechers am I connected to? How much data am I seeding to each one? How far along are their transfers? What's the estimated time of delivery? There are so many variables and so many numbers to reflect that. So many rates and ratios. I love meditating on how they all relate to one another. I even make a game of pitting my calculations of completion against those of the program, I imagine it's a lot like predicting weather patterns.

At it's core it's just soothing to me. Staring at the numbers is like listening to the beat of a metronome. It's constant and that comforts me. It's constant yet ever-changing, that comforts me more. In a way, all of these programs that relay this sort of information about the inner workings of their machinations are a lot like watches. Staring at the numbers is a lot like getting lost in the spin of wheels and cogs. On the surface, the way these things work is almost magical. It's all point & click. We don't really grasp what's going on... what's happening. I still don't, but the numbers hint at their greater wonder. It's always at work. Working with and against the change of things. Speeding up and slowing down. Shrinking and growing. Keeping things in balance. We don't usually notice that sort of thing until we absolutely need to, even then I think the awe is lost on most people. I'm constantly amazed at how efficient it is amid a sea of chaos. It's something to aspire to.

Mostly though, I don't think too much about it... any of it, when I stare at the numbers, I just stare... to stare. Really I don't know what's happening when I stare at them. I usually don't think too much about any of the things I blog about until I actually sit down and get to typing it all out. Everything's sorta fragmentary. It's something totally different to exist within the mind and then without. It is what it is. I don't know why it is. It makes perfect sense when I don't have to speak about it. I just know I love the feeling. My version of paradise is littered with tickers and scrawls, constant and ever-changing, displaying information about the minutiae of everyday life. It's one of those things that I've always loved about The Matrix. There's something there, this idea of code living in and being of the world but only understood by the coders. It speaks of the transcendent. Worlds within worlds. Layers upon layers. The meaning of meanings. Secrets and lies. Doors and windows.

It's just comforting to have it there... to know it's there. Every day... every night at stare at those numbers like one would count sheep and the numbers lull me to my sleep.


DS333, analyzing.